September 4, 2012

September 4, 2012

Parachuting looks fun, but you will probably never see me jump out of a perfectly good airplane. I imagine the best part of the experience is probably the freefall. Amazingly there are now ways for the average Joe to experience that “flying” without risking your life “too much”. Around the country, a dozen recreational wind tunnels have popped up. Wind tunnels are very expensive air blowers that used to be constructed primarily to test the performance of military aircraft. But when there is an opportunity to relieve people of their excess cash, determined entrepreneurs will figure out a way. Isn’t America great!

Aimee and I are meeting some Chicago friends at one such facility halfway between Tucson and Phoenix at a place called SkyVenture Arizona. When we get there I am forced to sign away my legal rights. With today’s litigious environment I am not surprised. We had to do it last month just to hike down a trail in Hawaii. I then have to cough up a bunch of money. The cost is $1200/hour. With no job I can only afford four minutes. That is the equivalent of four actual skydiving freefalls.

After our friends arrive, we climb the stairs to the entrance. In the center of the room is the wind tunnel, a 14-foot diameter cylinder with a steel mesh floor and four powerful fans on the ceiling. A clear glass wall surrounds it so an audience can watch the fun. I am calling it fun but the military rented the facility just prior of us. We are early so we watch what looks like an Army Ranger or Navy Seal unit practice their skills. We were warned not to take any pictures. All were dressed in fatigues, with parachute pack, a second backpack between their legs, and night vision goggles attached to their helmets. They obviously were training for insertion in some hostile location.

In between combat units, we watched the instructors play around. They “flew” like Tinker Bell in every conceivable position, including in a sitting position and upside down on their head. They made it look easy, which I can tell you, it definitely is not.

When it came to our turn, we watched a training video and practiced the “stable” belly position. Since it is noisy, we also agreed on a few simple hand gestures to communicate. We then were issued kneepads, helmet, earplugs, goggles and jumpsuit. Somehow mine was Fighting Illini Blue and Orange. We then entered a closed area next to the tunnel entrance and one by one went in for our first two-minute session. I was third. Inside the chamber, I got into proper position but struggled with trying to stay in the middle of the air stream. The instructor gave hand signals to tweak my position. I was never stable for more than a few seconds. I kept bouncing into a wall. It also wasn’t really fun as it could or should have been. More like work; too much sensory overload trying get it right, rather than relaxing and enjoying the ride.

After my initial session, I get out and wait in line hoping the second time is better. I want to know what minute changes I need to make to go forward-backward and left-right so I can stay in the middle of the air stream. Unfortunately that wasn’t part of the initial training. On my second two-minutes, I improved a little but not as much as I wanted. But for the climax each of us got to experience true flying. In the last few seconds, the instructor grabs a hold of me and we circle in tandem 35-feet up to the top of the air chamber and back down several times. It was both thrilling and scary. There are no safety ropes!!!!!